Star Stuff

"The cosmos is also within us, we're made of star stuff. We are a way for the cosmos to know itself."

- Carl Sagan

Evolution of A Practice

On occasion I get a question/comment that I feel I should just answer to everyone at once. This last weekend Flo commented:

"I love this and I am just curious. Is most of your practice at home on your mat and at workshops or do you have a steady practice with a teacher? You seem to have mastered some pretty advanced postures; and of course I am intrigued :)"

First of all - Thank You ♥... I'm sorry my answer is unreasonably long. (TL;DR at the bottom)

My practice has evolved through many stages. I have practiced for 11 years now - the first 6 years being On Again, Off Again. During those years I had literally just heard of yoga and I took a college class that met once a week. My very first class I had the epiphany that "This was for me." I had found my purpose. Then I sat around wishing I knew how to do something on my own. I lived in a small town and had no idea what to do or where to start. Eventually I found out that Rodney Yee came on at like 4am on TV, so I occasionally got up for a freakishly early practice. I remember the first time he got me to meditate. I was sitting on a blue foam block on a cold white floor in the dark... and something lit up inside me. I bought a power yoga DVD that I rarely used, but throughly enjoyed.

I was still in college and my husband had recently finished his degree - so we moved to Denver where he was offered a job. I signed up for more classes to hopefully finish my degree soon and grabbed another college class. I took the class which I thought was too easy, and I also practiced CorePower Yoga which came on at like 4pm on TV which was much better than O-Dark Thirty in the morning. My practice kinda came naturally to me, but I wanted more. I wanted to teach. My teacher that taught the too easy class had assigned us to write what we had learned about yoga and where our practice would go from here. I wrote that I desperately wanted to teach, but was shy. She told me that when we are passionate about things - we can overcome anything. She suggested I go to teacher training. So I Did.

During training in 2007 (4 months or so) I was at the yoga studio every single day. Sometimes I went to 3 classes in a day. I started to learn some fun little tricks. The last day of training - I got in a car accident. My yoga practice died. Eventually, with a lot of determination and willingness and education - I started over. Completely. I had to start from scratch... couldn't touch my toes, couldn't do downward dog, couldn't do a backbend.

After I had been slowly painfully therapeutically practicing alone for many months - I started teaching. I taught constantly and was lucky if I got to attend a public class once a month. Otherwise I almost had no practice at all. I'd never liked practicing at home, so I just didn't do it. Eventually, my husband got another new job in Oregon - so we moved here. No jobs, no prospects, the yoga community had died before I got here... so I was just alone. I hated practicing at home, but it was all I had... so I started writing class plans. I started practing at home by myself occasionally. Over time it grew into a full on all day everyday type of thing. I grew to love it. Sometimes I fall away from that, but I do practice at home by myself all the time.

I have taught myself tons of things. I get my inspiration from my Yoga Journal subscription and from reading  and videos online. I've recently started trying to go to workshops, but it's not reliable because we often get snowed in.

Back in the day - yogis would leave the world and go practice in a cave. This house has become my cave. I have been forced to go it alone... and I have taken this time to Dig Deep. My practice has grown by leaps and bounds... I have come far and I don't think I ever would've achieved what I have - if I'd stayed in the city and taught.

So I ultimately just have a home practice, but I sometimes take a class or a workshop to assess how I'm doing and get some new info. I think this is ultimately what everyone should do. Home practice should be your lifeline while public study should be supplemental - not the other way around.

TL;DR: I've had teachers occasionally in the past, but for years I have simply practiced at home by myself every day.

Cupcakes and Shopping

As I mentioned, Friday was my 29th Birthday and Adam took the day off to celebrate with me. I did yoga, got an amazingly huge yoga book, ate free food and had pizza for dinner. I finished off the day with going to see Black Swan which I loved. I also sent off the check to keep my spot reserved for a Noah Maze Workshop in Boise, ID next month. Yay! Can't wait. A simple, fabulous day.

Unless you've been hiding under a rock then you know Black Swan is about a dancer... and I love dancer movies. Watching this one reminded me how much I ♥ love ♥ dancer clothes. The costume designer for that movie (Amy Westcott) - should totally come outfit my closet. I loved it so much that today I ordered myself a fabulous long sleeve shrug from Buddhaful.

I'm eating cupcakes and planning on buckling down on eating better as soon as they're gone. Seriously. I eat way too much junk like cake. I'm going to cut WAY back on that. I eat pretty well, but cake and cookies are my vice. Well, that and shopping. We all have our bad habits and I'm going to try and wrangle this food thing into submission.

Happy Birthday to Me! (Video)

No post today because I'm off celebrating 29 years of being awesome.

Try to remain calm about today's lack of quality content.  Here's a video of what it might look like if you haven't been doing your yoga and consequently Freak Out.

Readers via email: Click here to watch the video

On Difficult Relationships (Video)

I love this video. It brings to mind some very specific people from my life... and it's quite thought provoking so I highly suggest you watch it. If “The Job of the Spiritual Friend is to Insult You”, then I have had many spiritual friends in my time. To my readers who have trouble with videos, here's a couple of main quotes from it:

“In order to become a completely loving person, a flexible person, you have to see where you’re hookable...If you really want liberation, if you really want freedom, you need people around to be provoking you to show you where it is you still have work to do.”

Originally posted Here at Elephant Journal with more discussion. I encourage you to give that post some love.

Readers Via Email - Click Here for Video.

A Series of Choices

It's Already Out There

My meditation area has been calling to me lately. Maybe even more like whimpering quietly in the most lonely neglected way. I don't even know when I last meditated. Not Good. Remember I mentioned ages ago that one of my major goals before I turn 30 (next year) is that I want to have a solid daily meditation practice. Which, I almost arbitrarily defined as a daily practice I've kept for at least 6 months. So far I've made it just shy of 5 months at a time. Something always happens. Whether in an asana practice, a meditation practice, or any other good habit like spending more time with your spouse - it's super easy to build inertia once you stop doing something.

Today I am going to meditate - if I have to punch old ladies in the face - I'm going to get it done.

Join me in this effort - if there's anything you need to get back into... something you need to prove is important or good... list it in the comments. Once you tell the world you're going to do something - it's a little bit harder to brush it off. Get it out there. Make Good Things Happen.